dags Aus. n. Dangleberries (qv).
dancer's lance n. an unwelcome erection that appears when dancing closely with a member of the opposite sex. A Saturday night lever; St. Vitus pants.
dangleberries n. Winnits; excrement adhering to the hairs around a badly wiped bottom.
dead otter n. A single stool of immense proportions.
death by chocolate starfish 1. n. An incredibly disgusting fart. 2. n. A chronic attack of the squirts.
devil's kiss n. A fart released by a dirty lady during sex in the 69 position. Also Hell's mouth.
diamond cutter n. The hardest erection known to man.
dicknobNEW n, Like Dickhead only lesser known. As in "Look at the state of that dicknob!"
dick wheat US n. Male pubic hair. Also dick weed.
diddles See diddy ride.
diddy ride See tit wank.
diesel dyke US n. Butch lesbian; stone (qv); fanny nosher.
dig in the whiskers v. Austral. To split the beard (qv). As in "Fuck me, look at that Sheila. She's worth a dig in the whiskers, wouldn't you say?"
ding-a-ling n. Chuck Berry's penis, with two silver bells hanging on a string.
ding-DONG! exclm. arch. Caddish expression of delight when Terry Thomas spotted a woman with dunce's hats (qv).
dingleberry roast n. An afterburner. A lighted fart.
dinner masher n. A diner who arrives on the other bus (qv).
dirtbox n. Rectum.
disco fanny adj. The full stretch flavour achieved by a vigorous evening of giving it six nowt on the dance floor.
dishonourable discharge n. The shameful result of bashing the bishop (qv).
ditch pig n. An affectionate lighthearted epithet for an ugly fat girl.
divot n. See biffer.
DIY euph. A single-handed job done around the house using one tool and a bag of nuts.
Dizzy Gillespie n. A formidable blast on the spunk trumpet where the lady's cheeks puff out like a bullfrog's.
do a Southampton v. sim. To score and stay up when you haven't really got it in you.
dobber n. A semi-erect penis.
docker's omelette n. A glistening gobbet of rubbery phlegm with remarkable anti-traction properties. A gold watch (qv); A Rolex prairie oyster.
dockyard rivet n. Cigar butts; pygmy's cocks.
dog n. Hound; boiler; tug boat; sea monster.
dogging v. To wander about at night on the pretence of walking a dog, but actually for the purpose of watching young couples have sex in cars.
dog's arse n. Wind trouble. As in "Excuse my wife. I'm afraid she's got a dog's arse today, your Holiness."
dog's bollocks euph. Bees knees; donkey's knob.
dog's egg n. A dog turd, often 'laid' on the pavement.
dog's marriage n. A back scuttle.
dog's match n. Any sexual encounter in public place, in bushes, doorways, under lamp posts etc.
doggies n. Intercourse in the position adopted by dogs, usually near some dustbins.
dollymop n. An amateur or inexperienced prostitute.
donkey milkerNEW n. He who likes the milk of the donkey, see wanker.
donkey rigged adj. Possessing a large penis.
double bassing v. To have sex from behind fiddling with the lady's left nipple with your left hand and her clematis with your right - a position similar to the one adopted when playing the double bass, although the sound is completely different.
double doors n. Beef curtains; cat flaps.
draw an ace v. On wiping one's arse thoroughly, to eventually have an unsoiled piece of paper which indicates the wiping is over.
draw mud from the well See follow through.
dreadnought n. Even bigger than a dead otter (qv).
dress-messer n. A gentleman with a hair trigger.
drink from both taps euph. To be bisexual; a switch hitter (qv); AC/DC.
drinking from a wet glassNEW euph, To go where another man HAS gone before, to go down on a woman after another man has jizzed in her.
driving range n. The perineum. Where you hit your balls when practicing with your wood.
drop a pebble euph. To erroneously emit a small body of faeces whilst attempting to break wind. Also follow through.
drop fudge v. To pinch a loaf; crimp one off.
drop your guts v. To break wind. "'Fossilised fish-hooks' croaked Venables. 'Which one of you beanfeasters has dropped his guts?'" (from 'Jennings Makes a Daisy Chain' by Anthony Buckeridge).
drop out n. When a testicle protrudes from the bottom of your underpants, or in Peter Beardsley's case, football shorts. As opposed to flop out (qv).
drop the kids off at the pool euph. To have a shit.
drown some kittens v. To pass a litter of small stools which nobody wants to give a home to.
dry bob n. Sex without male ejaculation.
D.S.B. abbr. medic. Dangerous Sperm Build-up. See Fussell's milk (qv). "I'm sorry Sir Cliff, but you are suffering from D.S.B. As your doctor, the only course of treatment I can prescribe is an A.D.W."
duck fart n, Noise made when a stone is thrown from height into water
dugs n. Breasts; baps; paps.
dunce's hats n. Them conical pointed tits found under woolen sweaters in 1950's America. See Twin Peaks.
dung hampers n. Undercrackers; trolleys; bills.
dunny Aus. n. Toilet. Also a popular knickname for someone called Dunn.
dump v. To drop a log; release the poop payload.
dunkie n. Contraceptive sheath.
dust the duvet v. To bash the bishop, especially at bedtime.
Dutch doors n. A bird who swings both ways.
Dutch oven n. The area beneath the bedclothes after ones partner has just played the dawn chorus on his botty bugle.
D.V.D.A. abbr. Double Vaginal, Double Anal. The Holy Grail of pornographic video acts, presumably involving four India-rubber men and one very uncomfortable woman.