Jacky Danny rhym. slang. James Hunt (qv)
jack off v. To choke the chicken (qv); jerkin' the gherkin.
jacked up adj. To be celibate whilst suffering from a venereal disease.
jam rag n. Tampon.
James Hunt rhym. slang. Jacky Danny (qv).
Japanese flag n. The appearance of the arsehole the morning after a vindaloo curry. As in: "Christ almighty! I think I'm sitting on a Japanese flag".
Jap's eye n. Male urethral opening; hogs eye (qv).
J. Arthur rhym. slang Masturbation. From J. Arthur Rank -wank. For example, while watching blue movies Jonathan Ross might say: "Phwwoar! What I weally want wight now is a quick J. Arthur".
jazz mag n. A printed volume of pornographic material; a journal of gentleman's interest.
jazz talc n. Bolivian marching powder; showbiz sherbet, Keith Richards' dandruff.
jelly jewellery n. The earrings, nose-studs, fancy spectacles and other facial adornments a lucky lady receives when her partner had intended to give her pearl necklace.
jelly water mangoes euph. Large knockers; gazungas.
Jemima suit n. A tight fitting costume worn by fetishists with strategically positioned openings over the erogenous zones.
jeweller n. A gifted manufacturer of jelly jewellery (qv) and pearl necklaces.
Jimmy Riddle rhyming slang Vicar friendly term for a piddle.
jism n. Semen. Also gism.
jittler n. Helmet cheese.
jizz abbr. Jism v. To ejaculate.
jizzbags n. The scrotum; John Wayne's hairy saddlebags.
jizzholeNEW n, See Spunk Bucket
jizz bolt euph. A glob of ejaculate that leaves the hog's eye with enough force to put the television screen through.
jobby Scotch variation Job.
jobby jouster n. A lunchbox lancer who jousts with another man's jobs.
Jodrell rhym. slang J. Arthur (qv). From Jodrell Bank, the Knuts...fnarr fnarr! (qv) ... ford space research laboratory.
Johnny See rubber Johnny.
johnny jibber n. To lose wood upon opening the flunkey (qv). Premature ejaculation and johnny jibber are thought to affect 1 in 4 males at some time in their life.
John Thomas n. The pet name by which Lady Chatterley's lover (on the level gardener Mellor) famously referred to his pink hoe, in the famous saucy book.
John Waynes euph. To walk like Mrs. Thatcher, ie. a gait adopted after giving birth to Meatloaf's daughter (qv). Makes the walker look like they've been sitting on a horse for three days.
jollup n. A dollop of jizz.
joombye (joom-bee) Scotch n. jism.
joskin, joskyn n. A yokel; a country bumpkin; a sheep shagger.
jubblies n. Breasts; pink pouffes.
jug-jousting v. See bunny rub.
jugs euph. Bosoms. As in: 'Pardon me madam, I was just admiring your lovely pair of jugs"